Discovery

So happy.
Decided to do something I've been too lazy to do for the past 5 weeks: go for a real walk.
There's a mountain behind my apartment (there's mountains everywhere) and it's green at the top. So I put on kitten heels and started walking in the hot hot sun, up up the steep little streets behind my place. Already I was happy. There are little shops, houses, tiny dogs, great views, less noise, better air.
Then the road diminishes, there are huge slate-like rocks upended alongside the track, curious. There are a insects everywhere, a little pagoda thing with a guy doing yoga, a botanical garden with signs identifying the flowers with their Latin names. I'm up really high, looking down on my suburb, the road I travel to work, out far to the next mountain, the next range, the next suburb. A huge black butterfly flies close to me, so big that at first I think it's a bird. Then I see some birds, like magpies but with blue wing tips. Flowers everywhere. Hot as hell. Sweat pouring down my next, back, legs.
Wonderful.

Bobostel

Way to make my apartment building look shite.
Take a photo of it.


Anyways, I'm in Zenit love - as always.
But, not in little man love as the dude who I thought was little man 2, is shit.
For those who don't know about me and little man...
There's a guy in Smith Street, Collingwood, who developed my pictures for me and has done for about 7 years now. I love him. I don't go anywhere else. When I went to Europe for a year I held onto all my filums and got him to process them on my return. He printed all the large shots for my show last year too.
So I felt, cos of the Zenit, that it would be difficult/upsetting to wait until I got home from Korea to get prints done. Thus I've been looking for a new little man. But this guy ain't the shit. I got reprints made and they were completely different to the orginals... Mostly, shitter. And these are the ones he scanned for the CD. Anyways. There are still some excellent moment... Checkem.

Camels and all that Jazz

After a fecking exhausting day at work - Little Concert, etc, I was so so happy to get a text from JD Whatever saying 'I know we're seeing each other tmr, and it's raining, and we're tired, but who cares. Let's have dinner.' Or something like that. Cos we're using Korean phones, we're limited to 80 characters. All messages have to be bloody short and sweet unless you know hangeul.
Anyways, we met at Sinchon, and were wandering about, hungry, when JD saw a spot and went to look at its menu... But I could hear something... "say it's only a paper moon" being sung across the way. How could I resist? I dragged JD across the street and told him we'd have to eat there. We thought we were really in luck when they gave us each a 'free' glass of red wine... But it was like the Georgian wine I used to get in Vilnius - so sweet it's really Ribena. Not to worry.
So we ate, then we walked, then we got Baskin Robbins ice-creams because I am Drew Barrymore and JD lerves BR ice-cream. The chocolate stuff that we both chose was clearly not made for the Korean climate and melted IMMEDIATELY all over us. Ah well. We walked to Hongdae, where I took JD on a tour of cool places that I pretend I have discovered but actually Ethan or Pix have taken me too. He was way impressed. We went to Seom first, then Brixx, where we were directed to a secluded love couch at the back of the joint, much to my horror. We moved seats and sat in the middle of the joint, watching all the American guys get it on with their Korean girls. Nice.
Suddenly realised it was time for the last subway, started running... Phone rings, it's Pix... "where are you?". She'd just got back from a day rocking out in the mud at the Pentaport Rock Festival and was ready to rock on. Nothing doing, we ditched the idea of being good kids, and sat with her and Korean friends to have a SECOND Korean BBQ of the evening, drink beer AND soju and start to get very silly.
Decided a cup of tea was in order - prolly about 2am - and Korean mate Jung-Sin lead us to a very quiet little upstairs joint - called Cafe & a Camel. Pix sold it to us as having no other customers and a door for a table. Ok. All true. But they were playing some terrible dancey music so I quick smart found a Bill Evans CD and get them to change it. Nice. The boys ordered tea and for some reason Pix and I thought a bottle of red was the go... Sorry Charlie, this was when I called you - 3.30am in Melbourne, of course you wanted to chat...
The Camel started to fill up, someone must have requested the Betty Blue CD, but it didn't last long... Made me pretty happy though. Pretty happy also watching Pix and Jung-Sin muck about, taking photos, being stoopid. Cute.
After a few hours we needed to leave, maybe to walk to the subway... But there was another cute place, maybe called Cafe Woods, so we stopped there and Pix and I headed for a wired-up laptop, where I showed her the YouTube post of Dave Mack's. Perhaps one of the best things ever. Do yourself a flavour and check it - I have 3 words for you - JamesBrown, MichaelJackson, Prince. Absolutely laughed my socks off. Again.

Anyways. Saw the lovers t-shit next door on way home.
As I slowly climbed the stairs out of the subway when I got to my home station, things felt good. The whole place was obscured by fog, it was beautiful, the temperature was just right, all was good.

...a melody played...

Say, it's only a paper moon,
Sailing over a cardboard sea,
But it wouldn't be make believe,
If you believed in me.

Yes, it's only a canvas sky,
Hanging over a muslin tree,
But it wouldn't be make believe,
If you believed in me.

Thanks, whomever wrote this song that Ella sung so beautifully.

Shocker Tees Co.

In honour of the shocker t-shits here in Korea, I've created a new folder in my photobucket for t-shit moments that I'm lucky/daring enuff to capture on filum. Inagural shot was of a t-shit I really wanted to buy... But the silver sequins were a bit much... and it was backless... and it was $50. May I introduce ::

Little Concert Day

Full review to come of the Little Concert - what a gas! I was the MC, all those songs were sung, all those kids were cute, all those parents with their videocameras and cameraphones aloft, all the Dads complimenting me on my English...
One superstar stood out in her white assymetrical singlet with gold lettering ::

R. ROBOT
Beach
Hawaiian

Then I went down the street to pick up reprints and CD of the latest Zenit shots, and I saw this on a large brown t-shit with aqua applique ::

EARTH
GRASPER
LBJ vintage style since 2001

Rote and Vote

Maybe it was always going to happen.. But yesterday I started I started teaching using the 'rote' method. As instructed. The students who have finished their textbooks don't get new ones - they get a 'conversation' book, which has little conversations in it like::
A: Good morning, Euri.
B: Good morning, Andy.
A: How are you today?
B: Fine, thanks, how are you?
A: I'm fine, too.
I hate this little book because it is boring. And whenever I say 'hi, how are you?', casually, meaning it, to a student, they parrot back at me 'Fine thanks, how are you?' And it's creepy and weird.

Also, today I saw a dead kitten.
On Sunday when JD came to visit we thought we saw a dead man but JD bravely inspected him and he seemed to be breathing. Unconscious men are not uncommon as serious overdrinking is the way to unwind if you're a Korean man.

Also, today after work I went home via the little market across the road from work. I've been feeling crook this week and was thinking maybe I need more/better food. So I bought sweet potato, cabbage, rice, and peppers that I won't know if they are hot until I bite into them.
Then I bought some snack on the way home... So hungry! I know they're made from rice but I'm not sure how you're supposed to eat them... These were BBQed in the street. Mmm yum.

Oh, best t-shit today::
VOTE
FOR MY
DADDY

The Hood

Walked home the back way tonight.. No, not over the mountain, but via some backstreets. I went into an organic food store and made a terrible mistake, spending $20 on some chili powder stuff. Sweet jesus. I know what I'm eating for the next 11 months - chili-flavoured dirt.
Anyways, I finally took my camera to work so that on the way home I could take photos of the demolition derby. When I first arrived there were 20 apartment towers either side of the street that looked abandoned. They had big red crosses painted over the windows and long grass... Very strange. Anyways, as they were 5 minutes old, they were to be demolished. New blocks will no doubt have replaced them by the time I leave.

The students who won the quiz contest on Saturday were given pizza today and yesterday. How excitement. Koreans LERVE pizza. And it's EXPENSIVE. Anyways the pizza boy came up to the school, in a feckin midriff top, that said ::

(front)
FEEL LIKE
SHIT
DEJA VU

(back)
DOOBIE BROTHERS
81

Sweet jesus. SHIT was 10 times bigger than the rest of the text. Maroon and yellow, no pictures.
Anyways, last night I left work and started walking home, so hungry from smelling pizza for 4 hours, so tired from kids, and my boss calls.
"Uh, hello - Jessie? It's Sidney"
"Yes, hi Sidney"
"Ok, so Jessie, I have something to ask you, I hope it is ok."
"Sure, no problem..."
"I hope it's ok, but I wanted to ask you to have dinner. With me. Tonight. Is it too late?"

WTF? Sure you can feed me... No problem... So she picked me up from my apartment an hour later, with her husband at the wheel of their KIA SUV and her sleepy kid in the back. First of all, they spoke English the entire time, which was so polite and nice, and second, we went to a really nice 'organic' restaurant at the base of a nearby mountain. There was something akin to 'fresh air' when I stepped outta the car. Her husband was really funny and talked heaps, asking me what I thought of North Korea, the Americans here, stuff. Then my boss asked me if we could make dinners regular as she is concerned her husband can't keep up with the 'Western culture' of his international workplace. She invited me to join them on their weekends away. Then before I got outta the car at home, she said "Jessie, is it ok if I give my husband your number so he can call you if he needs help? Sometimes... he needs help with some things."
WTF? "Of course, Sidney, no problem, that would be fine......................."

International Jazz Story

SLANG
FROM CHAOS

What's that?
Gold dust
EVERYWHERE!

Excellent t-shit yesterday.

I still feel a little seedy from Saturday night... Is that right?
Had such a freaking good time. After the Song and Quiz Contest at work, I met up with Luke (who I NEED to start calling JD, seeing as that's his new name) in Hongdae at 4ish, went to Ordinary Cafe which was great as always. Wandered the shops, made hair appointments for next week, had lunch in Hongdae, sitting outside in a plaza area, watching everyone go by, buying chewing gum from old ladies who came by....... Met up with Pix and headed to Ryan's fancy-pants hotel to collect him. Jumped in a taxi which followed the road by a palace to its end... Where we found Jazz Story.
I guess that's where the messiness began. Ugh. Decor was amazing, band was fantastic, wine hideously overpriced, and we were slowly becoming boorish, demonstrated primarily through our interactions with the band...... Consisted of repeated requests for songs that they couldn't play.... Play some Leonard Cohen! No? Play some Tom Waits! No? Play Elvis Costello! No? Fine.
Went to Ryan's room and drank plum wine with gold leaf that JD bought from the convenience store. Yum. Pix and Ryan blasted Dolly Parton and Kasey Chambers through the complaints (of mine, the neighbours, authorities, etc) until we headed back to Hongdae on the premise of visiting a kitten.
Anyways, had pork for brekky, got home at 8am. A new record for me in Seoul.

By the way. Got some great emails. Thanks LTR, JC, Mumma, Abe, Charlie, especially.

pretty blue gun

there's a young girl
with sweet little wishes
and pretty blue dreams
standin there and gettin all wet

i love you, tom waits.
love you, jc.

Melting Pot Raised

Worst t-shirt tonight - and I saw it twice - in yellow - and grey ::

(front)
king of the streets
(picture of beckham in beanie with diamante skull & crossbones)
DECIDE

(back)
VINTAGE
OF THE
TOKYO

Shocker. Went to Soundday and managed to get the subway home after one (free) drink. Proud. Saw two bands - nunco cobein, who rock out big time, and some other mob whose name I haven't transliterated yet. They teased us with the opening chords of 'Enter Sandman'... Which Mountain Goats did when I saw them way back whenever. Funny.

Plowshares

It's little concert week at my school. So I listen to Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da and Summer Nights and Dancing Queen and Heal the World upteen times a day.... Excruciating........................

We could fly so high
Let our spirits never die
In my heart
I feel you are all
My brothers
Create a world with No fear
Together we'll cry Happy tears
See the nations turn
Their swords Into plowshares
We could really get there
If you cared enough For the living
Make a little space To make a better place...

Thanks Mikky J, you really know where it's at.

Ice-T

Reasons why I still watch Law and Order:
1. It's the only show on TV I can stand/understand
2. Ice-T's character says things like this "Wouldn't be the first time a college student has flat-backed her way to a diploma."

Ohhhh yeah.

Worst t-shirt

I knew when I saw a guy out the front of my apartment this morning wearing this t-shirt that it would be hard to beat::

NOREH A DUNE
their charming

SSAM
BRIGADE
EARLY IN

If anyone has any clue wtf this means, I will pin a medal to your breast.

Article 88

I was reminded of Article 88 of the US Military Code of Conduct by AFN TV last night. Here goes::

“Any commissioned officer who uses contemptuous words against the President, the Vice President, Congress, the Secretary of Defense, the Secretary of a military department, the Secretary of Transportation, or the Governor or legislature of any State, Territory, Commonwealth, or possession in which he is on duty or present shall be punished as a court-martial may direct.”

Good stuff.

Drugs and TV

I have been compulsively eating snacks. I call them snacks cos I have no idea what they are really called... Nor what they are made from... Rice? Corn? Shrimp? I bought a bag as big as a pillow for 2000 won (aka 2 bux) and have eaten my way through most of it this weekend. Luke tells me Koreans call them 'drugs' cos they are so addictive. I get it.

And while eating them, tonight I watched a documentary festival on TV. Though sometimes I lucked out with the dubbed Korean, I watched 2 British docos that had subtitles so I didn't have to invent the narrative. They were both brilliant. The first was 'Songbirds' - a musical set inside a women's prison outside of London. It was heartbreaking. Women inmates told their stories about their crimes, lives, masturbation, abuse... This was interspersed with choreographed songs... Think 'Dancer in the Dark'. Intense.
The next doco was about Soviet humour, it was called 'Hammer and Tickle' and it was just so funny, giving a potted history of the rise and fall of communism as it went, and the evolution of anti-Soviet jokes. Excellent.
Hammer and Tickle featured The Scorpions and I think everyone benefits from a review of 'Winds of Change'::

I follow the Moskva
Down to Gorky Park
Listening to the wind of change
An August summer night
Soldiers passing by
Listening to the wind of change

The world closing in
Did you ever think
That we could be so close, like brothers?
The future's in the air
I can feel it everywhere
Blowing with the wind of change

Take me to the magic of the moment
On a glory night
Where the children of tomorrow dream away
In the wind of change

It's like a monsoon

Woke up at 5 today.
5pm. What the? I thought my clock was broken. I missed a whole fucking day. This rarely happens in my life. And my aircon was leaking, possibly because I'd left it on for 11 hours, possibly because there is a monsoon active.
Today, again, I got the first subway home. From Hongdae it takes 30 minutes, which is sooooo good. Especially when you're trying to stay awake. And your jeans are soaked through like I've been out wading waist-deep in a stream of rancid kimchi juice.
So last night was the opening of the show Ethan's in. I met up with Luke earlier near Insadong and had some food and beer and a chat with KP and started to feel reasonable. Had a wander in the fucking rain and a gander at the millions of galleries and touristy shops... It's very cute and nice there. Went upstairs to a teahouse and had a drink before going to the show, which every Westerner and her dog was at. Ethan turned up looking SHARP with a hot lady in tow. The sharpness lasted until the first sangria was poured and somehow ended up in a splatter pattern on Ethan's white shirt. Great. Was glad he remembered our pledge to wear ties though.
Anyways, show was good.......... Standing in the street after drinking beer from the convenience store and taking photos with the convenience store disposable camera was good too. Headed to Hongdae for the after party, by which time the rain set it. We still didn't think we needed umbrellas... Too cool, all that jazz. Within minutes we were actually wading - me in my cute new Korean kitten heels, Ethan in customary moonboots, and Misty in sexy red leather heels. Stopped at a convenience store and bought *expensive* umbrellas, waded waded waded along wondering deleriously how weather could be this brutal.
Ugh so sat a Seom and had a glass of red listening to some Aussie girl with a foghorn voice carry on. Ethan used a giant teddy bear to rest on. Sat and listened to the rain, listened to the rain, listened to the rain, incredulous. Eventually decided to move but we made the *wrong* move to Aura, which looked like a tip and had a live band blaring Japanese impro-experimental jazz. EXCRUCIATING. I blamed Ethan. Got outta there and crossed the street so we were out of earshot. We walked back along the deathtrap to FF but they were playing the GREASE song... which I've heard 100000000 times this past month as some students at school are singing it as part of the school's pop song contest (for which I am MC). So I convinced them to go to Nabi... Which is like returning to the womb... But with barely-legal sexy Korean boy-men in reclaimed Ray Bans with prescription lenses there. Excellent.
Ugh there's a postscript to the night's activities which involves a nice hotel room with *leaks* and no power... oh and what seemed like a frat-boy threesome... But I need to get some kinda snack.

Seoul Daze

So tonight was supposed to be the big night, and last night the stay-at-home night... Didn't work out like that... Got an email at 9pm from Pix saying get to wine bar to meet hilarious Aussie friends. Got to Seoul Station at 10pm - so, clearly my idea of getting the subway home was shot from the start, as I'd have to leave town at 11pm to make it. Also it took us 10 minutes to figure out how to cross the road. No shit. Then the map to the wine bar that Pix had was sketchy, so we somehow engaged the help of some random slightly pissed Korean guys, who stood with us spinning the map for a while, before one said 'wait a minute' and like speedy Gonzalez, ran off down the street. We stood bemused and laughing wondering wtf he had gone to do/get... Then he roars up the street on his scooter, motioning for us to get on... His bike is held together with sticky tape and he is in pajamas from what I can tell.. We get on! We go up the mountain! We see fancy schmancy wine bar perched on the hill... We dismount, give profuse thanks, and enter naos nova. Please please check out the website and see what I'm talking about... It has killer views of the city, only serves wine to drink, features a wine list that has bottles for 2,000,000 aka a month's salary, and kick-arse tapas with real flavours like prosciutto! and pesto!
Anyways I got the subway home... when it started again at 5.30am today. Hmm. I got in to my place and headed for the shower... That's when I discovered green ink all over my feet. Like all over. Like stained, like won't come off after agessssss scrubbing. WTF? Where did it come from?

Korea lyrics 1

Ok so hearing the Beck lyric 'Eat at Tacoria, pop lockin' beats from Korea' amused me so much I thought I'd find out which other 'artists' mention Korea in their music. I think there's no reason not to start with this gem from my old friends Rammstein, who clearly know where it's at:

Korea pants
Korea pants
Korea pants
Korea pants

They are cool
They are fun
They look good
on any nun

Korea pants
Korea pants
Korea pants
Korea pants

Repeat ad nauseum.

Afterlife

My apologies, and thanks.
I was really sick yesterday afternoon, and KP, Jack, Charlie, Dad, Anna Lee, the whole box and die of loved ones were all ready willing able to call me in the small window after work when I can use the pone here. But I had a chronic headache and bellyache. Couldn't even offer Oh Charlie the sympathy he needed after having a car aim for and meet his bike as he cycled to Toby's to call me. Couldn't offer sympathy to Jack, who was crook as and dragged his sorry arse to work as two containers of chairs had arrived. Couldn't go out to dinner with friendly American Luke from upstairs as I was busy spewing in the shower. Couldn't even get down to the letterbox to see that I'd 'received Charlie's package' (kisses). Ahhh it was an average night.
Better today... and I should say, it's Thursday, which means the weekend is nearly here! I do believe I'm gonna see some palaces and shit, I mean tourist sites, on Saturday which will be good. Then go to Ethan's exhibition which I've invited pretty much everyone I know to... Anyways. Gotta get my classes planned...

Lyrics for this morning: Modest Mouse: Ocean Breathes Salty:

Well that is that and this is this.
Will you tell me what you saw and I'll tell you what you missed,
when the ocean met the sky.
You wasted life, why wouldn't you waste the afterlife?